chubby bunny

that's me in high school. this is the picture i dwell on when i'm feeling especially, well let's face it, fat. i didn't realize how easy i had it in high school, i was in 3 sports and worked out several hours a day, so i got to eat whatever i wanted & it stayed off. i can't believe i thought i was fat then. well that was then and this is now, me... 30 lbs. heavier. so i've joined weight watchers again, for the third & last time. i can't believe how out of control i let myself become. i joined it a few months before sarah's wedding and lost, i think, around 10 or 15 pounds. and it felt great and now i can't remember for the life of me why i stopped. well, since then i've gained 17 lbs! since october! it makes me sick to even think of it. and i blame it on the fact that i'm comfortable and i love & that jason loves me for me and he loves my body the way it is. Well, i don't. So things are changing. Basically, I'm writing this blog because i know there are going to be times when weight watchers is getting a little too hard or strenuous for me *it's a lot of work!* so i'm going to fall back on this & write out my frustrations! my long term goal is to lose 30 lbs, but i'm going to set shorter goals for myself, to keep me motivated. i'm only on day two & i weigh in once a week *on wednesdays* so for short term, i'm going to look @ losing 5 lbs. i'm feeling really motivated & strong this time around, so hopefully this will stick. and hopefully i'll look even more fantastic in my after picture that the one i just posted. (yeah right, but we'll keep our hopes up anyway!) Jason's mom has been such a great source of motivation for me and the other night she told me something that i say to myself at least a few times a day, it really helps:

"nothing tastes as good as thin feels"

xo.